Whiskey (preferably fireball) or something equally as hard.
Cheap beer (who are we kidding, we live in Brooklyn, we're not drinking Miller Lite).
Limited edition red wine via Fergie.
Champagne if you want to nurse a headache.
Mixers for those who enjoy a good chase.
If Ezra has eaten M&M's in the past 24 hours, take a sip.
If Ezra or Rose have said "fuck off," take two sips.
If a disgustingly cute pet name has been said in the last ten minutes, take a shot of whiskey.
Clink glasses with the person next to you if you notice any visible bruises on the neck.
Drink for as long as Ezra can hold a single note (what's up, falsetto).
If Rose is wearing anything leopard print, take a shot.
If Ezra is wearing Polo, take two shots.
Chug a beer if Ezra has uttered, "It's lit!" in the last 24 hours.
If Vampire Weekend is mentioned, pour out a 40 oz and sob until you locate the funds brought you by Apple music.
Take a sip of a mixer if Rose has denied one of Ezra's sexual advances in the last twenty minutes.
Cross arms with the person next to you and drink if having another child was mentioned in the last 24 hours.
Have the person next to you close his/her eyes while you pour whiskey into his/her mouth if Ezra is not wearing socks (yes, that means you're both drinking since he is not wearing socks, suckers).
If you catch Ezra looking at Rose's tits, take a sip of your beer.
Challenge each other: give each other ten seconds to name as many cities as you have been to in the last year, whoever can name the most doesn't have to drink, the loser has to take two shots of whiskey.
If anyone is alive or if you've made it this far, be a responsible adult and drink a gallon of water, you fucking idiot.